Umbrella Crime Wave Continues: Washington Post Knows Nothing!

The Washington Post reports on a new instance of umbrella-carrying malefactors: This time in Potomac, Maryland, outside of Washington, DC, according to this poetic news account:

The rain falls, according to the Bible, “on the just and on the unjust, ” and a man who robbed a bank in Montgomery County on Friday may have taken that idea into account. 

The M&T Bank in Potomac was held up about 9:40 a.m. by a robber who seemed specially prepared for the wet weather conditions prevailing in the Washington area at that time. 

He had a handgun, Montgomery County police said. But he also carried, according to the description released by the police, an item not normally included in descriptions of robbers. During the robbery, police said in a statement, he “carried an umbrella.”

Unfortunately, the Washington Post is not familiar with the Brolly Blog and its crime reports involving umbrellas, not to speak of the use of umbrellas as weapons. For, as faithful readers would know, this is far from the first, and we do not purport to be complete in our recording. Nevertheless, the Post tells ITS readers that "But over the weeks and months, few descriptions of robbers have included umbrellas."

More important to our readership, the Post does note that "The account did not say whether anyone saw the umbrella unfurled." Thus, we can be assured that this criminal, at any rate, did not use the umbrella itself for nefarious purposes, but was preserving it for its primary purpose--protection from the rain!

[Aside: In another report on the same crime, the headline writer says that the robber "wielded" the umbrella, but the text gives no support, merely stating that he had a black umbrella with him.]

Umbrella Video Goes Viral and Brolly Blog Had to Read It in the Newspaper

Finally, umbrellas make it into the gossip columns! After sneaking into movies, songs, literature, and luring the consumer dollar, umbrellas are in the big time--a viral video! According to a story "Fox host's umbrella factor" from The Reliable Source in the Washington Post on December 9, 2011, "On Wednesday night, Bill O’Reilly shoved a camera-wielding man with his umbrella while on his way to a White House holiday party." More importantly, this was caught on film and "Within hours, it was all on YouTube, fodder for his critics across the Web."



So, we have had stories about using umbrellas as weapons, but now we have it captured and reported:

“Leave me alone right now,” warned O’Reilly. [Brendan] Lane [a paid organizer for Wisconsin Jobs Now] asked, “Mr. O’Reilly, were you at Gingrich’s fundraiser?” He wasn’t, it turns out — but that’s when O’Reilly knocked Lane into the street with his umbrella and taunted, “Hey, sorry about that.”

Amusingly, while I don't believe 60,000 some hits is really "going viral" it is better than Brolly Blog ever does! Also, we read that O'Reilly did have to reach into the fictional character umbrella-holding bag afterwards on his show:

But on Thursday night's “The O'Reilly Factor,” he said that he felt threatened by Lane and wanted to call the police because “I thought the guy was out of control.” O’Reilly said he “felt like the Penguin in the ‘Batman’ show . . . shielding myself with an umbrella. And I'm lucky I had it — otherwise I would have punched the guy, and I would have been arrested.”

WOW BATMAN! POW!

[Aside: For those who followed the Washington Post link above, they might have noticed that the headline is the much more boring "Bill O’Reilly: Latest target of video activism." This is the result of search optimization dumbing down our language, so where amusing (or not) puns can still live in print, they die on the Internet!]

Travel Destinations: Umbrella Shops: Paris

Today the New York Times ran a slide show online about Paris, which included "Alexandra Sojfer at her umbrella shop". Given that there were only 20 slides, this certainly raises the stature of umbrellas in the travel industry! Of course, that allowed me to explore a bit and find that this is not just a woman and an umbrella shop, but a renowned umbrella shop with a long history.

As recounted in WishYouWereHere.com: Alexandra Sojfer's "grandfather Georges Gaspard fled Hungary for Paris in 1937 and began handcrafting umbrellas in his atelier.

"He quickly became the go-to parasol outfitter among fashionable parisiennes, and today, Sojfer creates exquisitely detailed brolleys and shaders in the styles he popularized. She hand-crafts every piece in the atelier behind this 1834 storefront on the boulevard Saint-Germain, where she's joined forces with umbrella purveyor Madeleine Gely next door."

I would tell you that, if you cannot travel to Paris, to visit Alexander Sojfer online instead--but, her craftmanship does not extend to the web, at least as of yet, as her site is "under construction"!

Note: While her shop makes it to one of 20 slides in the Times travel section, The Lonely Planet ranks her shop as #1011 of 1469 things to do in Paris and #166 of 616 shopping in France. But should we make it #1 for umbrella folks?

Umbrellas and Crime: Hide the Bank Robber and Collect the Money

It has been over two years since we last reported the use of an umbrella in a bank robbery, but it has happened again! According to the San Francisco Examiner:

On a clear and sunny Saturday, a careful crook walked into a bank in North Beach toting an open umbrella and walked out with handfuls of cash, police said.

The crook used the open umbrella to conceal himself from surveillance cameras during the heist at the Bank of the West on Columbus Avenue just after 9 a.m.

And if using the umbrella for concealment was not enough, this robber had the audacity to involve the innocent umbrella in the crime itself: "The tellers handed over cash, which the suspect collected in the open umbrella before fleeing, police said."

Umbrellas and Crime:

Book Cover: Started Early, Took My Dog: A Novel

Returning to my theme of umbrellas on book covers, I have hit a snag on this one. "Started Early, Took My Dog: A Novel" by Kate Atkinson. In this instance, the book cover showed up in a Barnes & Noble book review. However, there is nothing in the review to tell me about the place of the umbrella or even rain at all. Of course, it is always a dark and stormy night in detective fiction right? So, is that all there is? Thanks to Google Books and other sites, I can peek inside the novel and learn that one of the main characters in this story (NOT the private eye) does have an umbrella:

She bought a tweed Maxi code from Etam and a new umbrella. Ready for anything. Or as ready as she would ever be. Two years later she was in the police. Nothing could have prepared her for that. Bye Bye, Baby.

Not much, but something. I had hopes reading one reader who picked up the book because, among other things, she has "a thing for umbrellas," and a commentator on another review loves "the umbrella on the cover. Could use one like that with all the rain we’re having." but no other hints appear.

The umbrella must be a powerful one, however, since unlike other books, the umbrella surfaces on the paperback edition also. However, a very different umbrella, not the loud black and yellow that yells out at us, but a much more subdued, more detective-novelly one, but not the black that would accompany an male detective, but a rainy green. [Side note: The British editions have no umbrella, so maybe this is an American thing?] So, please tell me: Do I have to read the book to find out about the umbrella's strength of image?!

The Parasol is the Umbrella's Daughter

I did not know of this poem by Emily Dickinson. While it obviously deserves to be highlighted on The Brolly Blog, what really fascinates me is how just a quick Internet search shows it to be an inspiration for all sorts of things. But first, this short poem, in its entirety:

The parasol is the umbrella's daughter

The parasol is the umbrella's daughter,
And associates with a fan
While her father abuts the tempest
And abridges the rain.

The former assists a siren
In her serene display;
But her father is borne and honored,
And borrowed to this daFy.

According to James Guthrie: "Emily Dickinson's poem "The parasol is the umbrellas's daughter" is light and almost trivial at the first reading. However, it presents her sharp wit and writing signature. It gives the reader a glimpse of the relationship between the poet's father, Edward Dickinson, and his daughters, Emily and Lavinia, said to be an accomplished flirt. Descriptions of Edward Dickinson present a portrait that resembles an umbrella, austere and dignified, civic minded thus utilitarian and a subtle tyrant." Well, here is a portrait... does he look like an umbrella? Does anyone look like an umbrella?

In random order, first a quilt of this title done by Michele M. Bilyeu for the Alzheimer's Art Quilt Initiative. Her take on the poem: ""As I made this art quilt, I thought of my father, who faced and bore the burden of my mother's Alzheimer's with great honor, strength, and courage. I can only hope to borrow and carry those traits now as I continue to care for my mother, and honor my father, by caring for him, as well." and on umbrellas: "For all those whose strength and courage are tested with this challenging disease, and in honor of all of those who both carry, and lend their umbrellas."

Second, a fashion statement by Emily Schmemily on Polyvore. Her umbrella: Blue Paper Parasol with Bamboo Handle -- MNInternational

Look Ma! No Hands! And my Umbrella is Staying Up

Than you Daily Mail for today's invention. From a cabbie, no less: "Cabbie Ibra Ahmed hopes his hands-free umbrella will be ideal for ladies who struggle carrying their brolly and other items." Now, why this should only be for women, I don't know. Seems to me that men might want to text while walking in the rain, too. So after Mr. Ahmed makes his initial fortune with "Hands Free Brolly Bag" maybe he will turn his attention to the other half of the population and create a brolly with a man bag.

Of course, there is competition out there. So wish Mr. Ahmed luck against The Hands Free Brolly Company, Ltd. (for those who push prams or wheelchairs) and, of course, the often featured Nubrella.

Book Covers: Cutting for Stone

Another book, another apparent fiction best seller, another book I had not heard of. This time we have an umbrella on the cover of the U.S. 2010 Vintage paperback edition of Abraham Verghese's "Cutting for Stone." [There is no such image on the original hardback or paperback covers.] So, let's go fishing.

No clues on Amazon--a lot about doctors and twining medicine into fiction but nothing about umbrellas. Not looking for rain either, since the umbrella holder appears to be in a sunny meadow. So on to Google. First hit is Google books with an excerpt with the word umbrella in it; from page 295:

One morning, as I went down to the gate, umbrella in hand, I saw a woman coming up the hill to Missing, rivulets of water pouring off her umbrella.

That's nice, but has nothing to do with the cover image. Second hit not good at all: A reading guide which tells us that an early part of the story takes place in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, which, among other things, retains "Campari umbrellas" left behind by the Italians. Well, I do like Campari and bitter lemon, but that isn't a Campari umbrella.

Not doing any better with remaining hits. Do hit a gold mine--for book covers, but not this book--on the second page of hits with a link to a Goodreads Listopia on Umbrellas: 78 book covers with umbrellas on; I can go two months plus now without doing any searching on my own!

Well, further refining of searches is getting me nowhere. I get other references about the story: family saga, three continents, doctors, Siamese Twins, but no umbrellas. So, tell me, Internet, who is on the cover and why the umbrella?

Book Covers: Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet

Okay ... a long absence, I start a new theme. Book covers with umbrellas on them. Today's random selection is the U.S. edition of "Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet" by Jamie Ford. So, I know nothing about this novel, see that it is selling well and need to know why there are two people holding umbrellas on the cover.

First, the word "umbrella" does not show on Amazon's listing for the book. It shows Publisher's Weekly saying that Ford's "strained debut concerns Henry Lee, a Chinese-American in Seattle who, in 1986, has just lost his wife to cancer," and Seattle is notoriously rainy, so maybe that is it? Wild guess, but the word "rain" also doesn't show up in any of the first page of reader reviews either.

Second, on to Google. Well, I find that searching for the book and umbrella is mightily productive. The very first hit (and will this entry now beat that?) is for someone else's discovery of the number of book covers she has with umbrellas on them (hint--source for my next pick?). Anwyay, the Infinite Shelf finds that on this cover "the tones are beautiful, sweet and melancholic," but still no answer to why umbrellas.

Second Google hit does better. This time a review of the book by Andrea Ruiz in which she tells us that Lee is wandering by a hotel where the current owners, "who want to restore the building, find the belongings of Japanese-Americans who were sent to the internment camp. Each artifact is brought outside and shown to the public, and Henry sees an umbrella with a koi painted on it. This brings a rush of emotion and he is overwhelmed with memories of his past." Well, this is good, an umbrella as a key to memory, a la Proust's madeleine ("involuntary memory" according to Wikipedia).

So, not bad. Don't get anything out of any subsequent hits except for this exact excerpt:

The new hotel owner, a slender Caucasian woman, slightly younger than Henry, walked up the steps holding . . . an umbrella? She popped it open, and Henry’s heart beat a little faster as he saw it for what it was. A Japanese parasol, made from bamboo, bright red and white—with orange koi painted on it, carp that looked like giant goldfish. It shed a film of dust that floated, suspended momentarily in the air as the hotel owner twirled the fragile-looking artifact for the cameras.

So, I am better off, but still don't know why there are two people holding umbrellas on the cover!

Addendum (1/25/2012): I picked up a copy of the book at a sale table at my local library, and the reviewer was indeed correct--the umbrella (parasol) is a memory key for the protagonist (Henry). There is also at least one other umbrella, his own, a necessary accessory in rainy Seattle, where the story takes place.

We Got Your Back: Wet Umbrella Protectors

This may have been around for a while ... and they are not cheap (that is, commerical use only), but hey, we are protecting our umbrellas; not leaving them around wet and then forgetting them later. Now, when you look at the comments at The DailyWH, you see folks objecting, since water dries up, etc., but these folks just don't understand, it is not that we don't want our umbrellas to stay wet, but that we want to keep our umbrellas with us. So, way to go Kasapon.

Short Fiction: An Umbrella, a Wish, an Umbrella Factory

Umbrella Factory

Well, we have found umbrellas in literature, but we haven't had much occasion to find umbrellas in our current reading, but now we have. Saïd Sayrafiezadeh has a short story in the March 1, 2010 issue of The New Yorker entitled "Appetite." While the narrator is a waiter, umbrellas figure in one digression in the tale: First, some rain and then his umbrella: "My umbrella was no defense. After two blocks, the material tore away beneath the onslaught, so that I was holding only the frame of an umbrella." Second, his wish: "Why could no umbrella be invented to withstand a downpour?" and then his memory of an umbrella factory:

I was called one June morning to meet with the supervisor of an umbrella factory. It was a small, family-owned place on the outskirts of town, where factories still existed. I had to take three buses to get there. The supervisor was a sweat-stained man in a tie, with one button missing from the center of his shirt. He was looking for an office clerk. ... Afterward, he showed me around the plant. It was old and made of wood, and I assumed there were mice. A group of Mexicans, or people who looked like they might be Mexicans, stood around a long table spray-painting assorted logos onto umbrellas. I was curious about their work, and the supervisor took me closer so I could see. The smell of paint was pleasant and reminded me of my kindergarten days.

So what is it about umbrella factories? Do they hold up metaphorically. We have visited one with the Queen of England, and Charles Dickens wrote about how umbrellas are made, but otherwise, we kn ow very little about them. Just another good, another manufactured good. But, maybe what Sayrafiezadeh captures is it--umbrella factory as small, family owned, with just the hint of bigger marketing with the painted logos. So, let us ponder, as we listen to The Sea's song: Umbrella Factory.

one day we will wake up
wondering where we are
we'll find it all messed up
the rain will wash away
what's left of us
wondering where we are
we'll find it all messed up
the rain will wash away

Squidarella: The Color Changing Umbrella

http://www.urbantrim.com/squidarella-color-changing-umbrella/Thanks to Fabsugar for directing us to this one. The designers at SquidLondon have come up with this color changing technology. According to UrbanTrim:

The umbrella starts out in black and white. As the rain starts falling on the umbrella, each drop will cause the colorful design to show through. Eventually when the whole umbrella is wet it will have morphed into the vibrant colorful version that you can see above. When the rain stops and the umbrella dries the colorful design will slowly fade back to white.

They don't seem to be the only ones, since you can also get a Suck UK Color Changing Umbrella So let us start the color changing wars--maybe even start a color changing blog, so you can track color changing animals and color changing roof tiles. Or, reject it all and accept the true umbrella color: black.

X-Ray Umbrellas: Disappointing, You Can't See Through Things

How could we not check this one out. Thanks to Walyou, we were introduced to the X-ray umbrellas of Anastacia Spada, but our hopes of some technological breakthrough--think of the possibilities!--were dashed when we found out her work was making umbrellas out of old X-rays. A worthy cause, complete with an instruction manual, but not one we were hoping for.

Spada's project was inspired by the magazine ReadyMade. She was given the task of finding objects that are commonly discarded, and re-purposing them in a way similar to projects found in the magazine.

Winter Weather: Snow and Umbrellas: Yea or Nay?

Opining in USA Today, Craig Wilson says Nay--noone from the real north, where there is real snow all the time, would think of using an umbrella in the snow. Yet, after 25 years in the "South" (Washington, DC area), he ponders: "What's up with these umbrellas? Yes, umbrellas. Umbrellas in snowstorms. I don't get it. Everyone knows you don't carry an umbrella in a snowstorm. But here they are."

Well, apparently he isn't the only ponderor this season. The Washington Post Capital Weather Gang poll, with a tip of the hat to the Urban Bohemian, had 3% always using them, 23% sometimes, and 72% "Never. Umbrellas in snow are wimpy."

But, go further in the blogossphere and the Net, and you will find paintings of umbrellas in the snow,  Japanese snow umbrellas, and comments that some snowy places (Slovenia) have always used umbrellas.

So, folks, if it keeps the snow off your head and keeps you dry, use that umbrella.

Miss Umbrella Girl: Does This Have To Be Only for Malaysians?

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Now we know where to go to find folks who truly appreciate umbrellas for what they are good for--not rain, nor sun, but advertising! According to the The Star--Malaysia's biggest English newspaper, new Miss Umbrella Girl 2010 contest, to be held in Penang from March 13-14, hopes to produce a new batch of brolly beauties who are articulate and media savvy.

What are "umbrella girls"? Apparently, they "are an integral part of glamour sports events like the MotoGP, SuperBike Championship, Formula One, Nascar and other team races. Sponsors hire them to hold umbrellas over the heads of their riders while wearing their logos and corporate colours. They are indispensable at high profile races and part of their job is to pose with admirers and spectators."

Unfortunately, however, they "are ranked lower than models, actresses and beauty queens." But at least they are UMBRELLA GIRLS. In other countries, they go by other names: are called Race Queens (Japan), Pit Babes (Britain),  Pit Girls or Grid Girls (Europe), Racing Girls (Korea), and Pretties (Thailand).

So, if you want to be an Umbrella Girl (or a Mini Umbrella Girl), head to the island of Penang (and register at Go Penang). [You could also become the Most Popular Umbrella Girl or the Most Talented Umbrella Girl (although I doubt that is judged by how well you hold the umbrella).]